Women usually feel more threatened by the emotional betrayal of a partner’s online affair, while men are more concerned about physical encounters, Hertlein says, but the gender differences are lessening.

“That is starting to even out in part because of the equality of opportunity that the Internet brings to everybody,” she says.

Of course, there’s nothing quite so frustrating when you put all of that effort into your profile and start sending out all of those messages… In fact, that’s the reason why so many men quit online dating entirely; who wants to expend all of that emotional energy only to get kicked in the metaphorical nuts by that empty inbox every time you log in? Well, to mangle an old saying: once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, three times means you’re doing something wrong.

Sometimes you have to accept that the only common denominator in all of those people you’re messaging. She hasn’t responded to a single email you ever sent… One of the risks (for suitably inflated values of “risk”) that you’re going to come across in the world of online dating is the dating site account that’s dead yet still shuffling around: the zombie profile.

While men traditionally have been the more unfaithful sex, gender roles are reversing in some cases as more women experience cybersex.

“I think there is this bias that women don’t cheat for sexual reasons at all,” Hertlein says.

Do something where you'll have something to talk about. On the other hand, you don't want to put your date, yourself or your son in embarrassing situations. Question from Denise: Are online dating sites good ways to meet people? You have to try different sites to see which ones feel comfortable for you, and which ones have tools that you think will create a better chance of a good relationship. But I think third date it starts to up the ante, and by the fifth date there is some pressure for some sexuality.

That is to say, you are a mature woman and you want to date, so I think you need to talk to your son and tell him that you are going to start dating again. But there is more to love than hair color, and I think people pick who they love on other criteria.

They may have set up the profile on a lark and forgot about it after moving on when some other social network caught their attention.

If there is no physical contact or actual sex, is it still an affair?

“It’s not just that you’re communicating with someone online but that there is a sexual or emotional nature,” says Katherine Hertlein, Ph D, an associate professor at the University of Nevada in Las Vegas who studies online affairs.

Pepper Schwartz Question from Carl: I recently started dating after a divorce. He is 22, and he has heard of "dating." Question from Guest: Men with gray hair are thought to look distinguished. And they are good introductions to social networking, and a good way to ease into trying an actual dating site. » Question from Leanne from Austin: What are the rules about dating and sex today? One of those things that you can pick on is whether you and this person have similar values.

What advice would you give me as far as first date suggestions? And if waiting is important to you, I assure you there are people out there who feel the same.